Your presence is requested...

I love my solitude.

via Flickr

And I love being around other people.

It's another one of those dichotomies that life is full of.


What makes my interactions with others flow that much easier is my moments of solitude. The peace that I gain from a conscious withdrawal that is focused on my inner self, allows my extroverted outer personality not to get swept up in the many distractions that life can offer.

It also gives me the ability to be completely present when I am around others.

Presence provides insight and clarity around interactions. It allows your intuition to strengthen. Best of all, presence strengthens your personal sense of power. Your ability to direct your life in a manner that reflects your highest thoughts.

image via Alaska in Pictures

When we're not fully present in this very moment, our subconscious dominates and causes us to  re act to our surroundings. We play out immature behaviours and retell the stories of our past hurts and disappointments in every action that we take.

This narrative of the past dominates and supports a thought system that acts only to draw us away from the present moment into a cycle of repetition. It fuels concerns and anxieties about our future; destroys our healthy connections to others; and puts up walls to communication.

image via nairaland

We become basic in our behaviours.

Our responses to others when we're in this state are not well thought and can quite often be irrational, simply because we're re acting rather than inter acting. We're unknowingly weaving all of these irrelevant aspects of the past into our present moment and confusing the issue at hand.

Physiological responses are triggered by anxiety, and whether it's high stakes stress, or the just as damaging low grade but constant worry, it's still causing the body to respond in a way that is not ideal.

So how do we put an end to these thought processes?

"Keep some of your attention within. Don't let it all flow out.


Feel your whole body from within... as if you were listening or reading with your whole body." (Eckhart Tolle)




The best solutions are the most simple:

Meditate regularly





If you find yourself too distracted to sit quietly and focus on your breath, with some relaxing music in the background, then get outside and exercise.

image via tooniq8

Walk, cycle or run. Hit a yoga class or practice QiGong in a nearby park. Repeat some affirmations while you do it, but make sure you do it.

Approach it with discipline and commitment and your presence will increase.


So when are you next meditating?

Taking Responsiblity

Responsibility is a word that's common enough and one that is worth reflecting on... It implies an ownership of sorts and reflects accountability. Knowing what we're accountable for is one of the first steps in taking responsibility.

image via all left turns

In technical terms the Locus of Control refers to how people internalise personal responsibility, versus attributing accountability to a source that is external to them. Some people place control of their life in a higher being and many others, place the results of their life in their upbringing, the teacher who didn't help them, or others who have wronged them.

image via jokes and humour

This is where many people suffer conflict. Not understanding personal responsibilities brings confusion, chaos and distraction. This same lack of personal responsibility can occur at the physical level when people eat without thinking, or don't make time to get up and be active in their physical lives.

image via natural health hoodia

Doing this in the shorter term might make you feel a bit tired, or at it's worst unwell. Over the longer term, the internal workings of your body will become worn down faster, and bad health will result.

image via health mad

Regardless of your beliefs, your history, or your upsets, once you grow up you are responsible for how you perceive yourself and for what you create for yourself. You are also responsible for your actions toward others.

image via parenting thoughts

If you perceive yourself as lowly, or incapable or fearful, you will create a life that reflects your thoughts. A life that you don't value, where you are too afraid to try things you've never experienced. By the same thinking, if you treat people poorly and live a life without expressing compassion, understanding and forgiveness you'll attract people who support your beliefs and invest in the outward expressions of your beliefs. People who for whatever reasons, are in a similar position to the one you've created where conflict and fear dominate choice, and a sense of powerlessness around the behaviour of other people rules your decisions.

image via thinking out loud

If you perceive yourself as capable, loving and peaceful then you will create for yourself a reality that reflects your inner thoughts and be better equipped to deal with the life challenges that we all need to face. You will find yourself drawn to people who are capable of lifting you up and helping you to be the best you can be. And, best of all, you will find yourself doing the same for others.

image via wired

Identifying yourself as capable can often take a lot of deep personal work, or it can be a very simple decision. Either way, it requires constant vigilance and very few people arrive at this understanding without vast life experience and the distinct acquisition of wisdom that is entirely optional at all stages of the life experience. As we grow in capability, our responsibilities become clearer to us.

image via sia hq

Understanding clear healthy boundaries and knowing how to assert them successfully is an enormous part of the work involved (and worthy of further musing at a later date). It's a constant job this human experience, but one that can be filled with love and joy if we make that choice for ourself.



What responsibilities limit your relationships to other people?  What responsibilities limit your relationships to food?  What responsibilities limit your relationships to exercise?  What responsibilities define your relationships to other people?  What responsibilities define your relationships to food?  What responsibilities define your relationships to exercise?

Mindfulness and Depression

St John's Wort (Hypericum perforatum) can be successful in treating mild to moderate depression. The success and limitations of this herb are certain and clearly supported.

via bob klips

SSRI's are a class of pharmaceutical drug used to treat major depression, but many people are unsure about living with the longer term side effects of these drugs and so look for alternatives. It is this group that have been used as a sample for Canada's Centre for Addiction and Mental Health investigations into mindfulness meditation.

via telegraph.co.uk

The results have been supportive of the cognitive therapy which show it to be "as effective as antidepressant medication in prevention of ... relapse".

Are you practicing mindfulness daily?



NOTE: St John's Wort is not a herb to be self prescribed when someone is taking any other medications, including prescribed contraceptives, or has any other health concerns. Call me or drop in, to ask about the suitability of St John's Wort for yourself, or to enquire about meditation techniques that may also be suitable.

Monday Musings

Bring on the calm...

via smart escapes

Today we're back to Spring and it's a gorgeous bluebird day where I live, after a fairly feral weekend of snow storms and high winds. It's got me thinking about the need for peace even where there is chaos. 

So how do we achieve or maintain that deep sense of peace that we are each capable of? 

Taking time out for meditation or reflection is essential as it helps to refresh the body and the mind. It quietens the nervous system, and stimulates the immune system to bring about faster healing, which is why I recommend meditation to a lot of my clients. It can be achieved by sitting quietly without distraction and focusing on the breath, or by following a guided meditation. I've linked through HERE to a fabulously simple guided meditation that is a quick ten minute refresher to calm and quieten the mind. The sound of gentle waves is what one of my clients uses every night to help himself get to sleep. But invest this ten minutes in yourself, and you'll feel refreshed and less complicated.

Equally we can use exercise to clear the mind. Exercise decreases cortisol production and stimulates the release of endorphins, seratonin, and dopamine. This produces a relaxant effect on the body and contributes to a sense of wellbeing. Regular exercise is something that most of us are easily capable of but make little time for. When the days are a little longer it can seem easier to wake early but still many of us make excuses about why it's not possible to schedule it in. To make time for everything and everyone else and yet to neglect yourself, can come at a very high cost. So get out and walk up a nearby hill to get your heart rate up, sweat a little and push yourself a bit. In the town where I live there's a gym at the top of the hill with some awesome programs.   When you get to the top you can pause to appreciate the view and reflect on how you've just provided yourself a great foundation for moving toward an abundance of good health (and even consider a class at the gym if you live nearby and are feeling inspired).

What physical activity are you doing at the moment that pushes your heart rate up?